I cant believe it
by NotYourTypicalCliche
Summary: Spencer Reid had it all. Until it all came crashing down
1. Prologue

**An:**** I have posted this before but i took it down for some reason, not sure why. I have decided to post it again. I will be updating it every saturday if i can :) Enjoy**

**Prologue**

Spencer Reid had it all. He has an IQ of 187, multiple PhD's and BA's and the people he worked with were like a family. There was Hotch who was like the father figure and Rossi who was like the cool uncle. There was Morgan who was like an annoying older brother who always teases you. Then there was JJ who was like the mother figure, the person you could go too for anything. Lastly there was Garcia and Prentiss who was like the sisters. They were one big family who don't always see eye to eye but wouldn't change anything for the world.

The one thing he was most proud of was his girlfriends and his little angel. His girlfriend Roxanne was his other half, his soul mate, the only one for him. She could be a model and could get any guy she wanted but she wanted him. He could never get over that, he doesn't know what she sees in him. She was 5'6 and had black hair to just below her shoulders. She was the only person who he would open up to; she knew things which even the team didn't know about. They had a little girl called Eve. Spencer called her his little angel, even though she loved her mummy she was daddy's little girl. She has Spencer wrapped around her little finger just like her mum.

Spencer's life was perfect. He had the best friends and family he had always wanted. He would do anything for them all.

That's until it all came crashing down on him. His little angel got brutally murdered and his Roxanne got taken away from him. He had become more withdrawn at work and the team began to notice. He would always snap when Morgan, Prentiss and Garcia meddled in his love life. His team knew nothing about Roxanne and Eve; he liked it that way. Well they didn't until Garcia and Morgan dug a little too deep in his personal life.


	2. Chapter One

**Chapter One**

**An: Here is the first Chapter like i promised. It was orginally longer but i decided to split the chapter in half. Hope you like it. Dont forget to review :)**

It was a normal day at the BAU. It was nearly 11 and Spencer had already had 5 cups of coffee. The team noticed something was off with Spencer, he wasn't his normal self. Normally he would be sprouting tons of statistics out of his mouth like 'our conscious mind can process 16 bits of information per second; our unconscious minds however can process 11 million'. Today was the first anniversary of Eve's death and Roxanne's disappearance. Not a day goes by where he doesn't think of them, he has never given up hope. He is still looking for the person responsible for his life galling apart.

Morgan looked up and saw Spencer lost in deep thought with a frown on his face. It seems like he was about to burst into tears. He has never seems so distracted before; it made him feel uneasy. Morgan slowly got up and made his way across the bullpen towards the youngest member of the team. Spencer didn't even look up as Morgan's shadow casted over his desk. He only looked up from his work when Morgan cleared his throat loudly. This also made Prentiss look up to see what was going on.

"Hey Reid are you ok? You seem kind of out of it today."

"I'm fine Morgan." Reid snapped leaving both Morgan and Prentiss shocked. He never snaps at people.

"You're seriously not kid. I know what will cheer you up, how about the team goes out for a drink after work." The dark agent offered.

"I cant I have plans." The smaller agent replied while getting up from his seat.

"Let me guess a Star Trek marathon." Prentiss said putting her input into the conversation.

"For you information Derek and Emily I am not having a Star Trek marathon, I am doing something more important and anyway what I do after work is none of your business." Spencer fumed before storming to the break room closing the door rather forcefully behind him.

Morgan and Prentiss knew that they went too far. Reid never shuts the door to the break room. Morgan quickly recovered from shock and made his way to see Garcia the Technology Analysis. He was so lost in thought that he didn't realise he had been standing outside of Garcia's "Lair". He soon came to his senses and knocked on the door once before entering.

"Hey sugar I need you help." Morgan greeted.

"Sure what can I do for my chocolate god?" Garcia replied. Everyone was used to their playful relationship.

"Something is bothering Reid and I want to know what it is." He said with concern thickly laced in his voice.

"Sure, whatever helps our little G-Man." She replied while typing away at her computer. What came up on the screen shocked them both.

He was coming home form a case and found the door to his apartment open. He walked in to find his two year old daughter dead lying in a pool of her own blood. She had her throat split and multiple stab wounds on her stomach. Next to her was a typed note from the unsub. It told him he got everything he deserved for taking the love of his life away so he killed his daughter and took Roxanne back.

"Poor pretty boy, no wonder he seems out of it today." Morgan said not believing what he just read.

Someone suddenly clear their throat behind them successfully gaining their attention. They turned round to find a very pisses off Spencer. They had never seen him look so angry before.


	3. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

**An: Here is the next chapter people. I might not be able to update next weekend but hopefully I can. I can't I will try to upload next monday :)**

**Enjoy! Dont forget to review :)**

_Previously_

_Someone suddenly cleared their throat from behind them, successfully gaining their attention. They turned round to find a very pissed off Spencer. They had never seen him look so angry before._

"Pretty boy before you say anything we-"Morgan said before getting interrupted by Reid.

"DON'T PRETTY BOY ME DEREK. YOU DON'T DESERVE TO AFTER WHAT YOU HAVE DONE. I CANT BELIEVE YOU WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO ME. YOU COULDN'T JUST LEAVE IT ALONE COULD YOU? THE WORST THING IS THAT I TRUSTED YOU TWO AND YOU BOTH BROKE IT. FRIENDS DON'T DO THAT TO ONE ANOTHER, THEY DON'T LOOK AT PEOPLE'S PAST WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION." He yelled with such rage it made fear flicker in Garcia's eyes and made Morgan freeze on the spot.

"I thought you guys were family; I guess I was wrong. Family wouldn't do that to one another." He said sounding hurt before walking away. Reid carried on walking out the building until he got to his beat up Volvo. He knew that when Hotch found out he has just left he is going to be in big trouble but at his moment doesn't care, he had to get away from them. He got in his car and drove to the cemetery where he laid his daughter to rest before her had even begun.

He walked down the familiar path heading to his angel's grave. He sat down at her grave thinking of all the good memories they shared together. After 10 minutes Reid got up and walked back to his car. He went to the nearest bar and got a drink.

~Back at the BAU~

Morgan walked back to his desk feeling disgusted with himself. How could he do that to him? Spencer meant the world to him. He completely betrayed his trust and that was the one thing Spencer hated the most. He knew he was going to have to work hard to get Spencer to trust him again.

JJ poked her head out of the conference room and told them they had a case. Morgan walked with Prentiss lost in thought, not realising that they youngest team member had left the building. They had all sat down when Hotch noticed the empty seat.

"Where's Reid?" Hotch questioned. Morgan shifted uncomfortably hoping the unit chief didn't notice.

"Morgan do you know where he is?" Morgan sighed knowing that they would be able to tell if he lied.

"Well earlier me and Garcia looked up his past and found something he didn't want us to know, so he shouted at us and gave us a look of disappointment before leaving." He answered wincing at how it sounded.

"Well, I guess we should brief him on the Jet when he comes back" Hotch said before turning his attention to JJ waiting for her to start.


	4. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

Spencer sat at the bar lost in his own thoughts while nursing a glass of whiskey. He was brought out of his thoughts by his phone ringing. He looked at the caller ID. It was Hotch. Reid hesitantly answered the call and then hung up straight up straight after Hotch told him they had and told him he had 20 minutes to get to the Jet.

When he arrived at the airstrip he quickly pulled off his sweater vest, tolled up his sleeves up to his elbows, ruffled his hair a bit and loosened his tie and undoing the top button of his shirt before grabbing his go bag and getting out his car and started slowly walking towards the Jet. He is determined to become just as confident as he was when Roxanne was around.

He wanted a new start. One step towards to that is changing how he looks. The next the needs to do is find a new place to live and possibly in a different state. As soon as he entered the Jet everyone turned to look at him.

"Wow Pretty boy, you look." Morgan exclaimed then shut up immediately when seeing the look Reid sent him.

"Thanks, I think." Spencer replied before taking a seat opposite Hotch and next to JJ. There was a uncomfortable silence while the Jet was taking off. It eventually got broken by a timid agent.

"So what's the case?" Reid asked JJ the media liaison.

"There have been 4 killings in two weeks in Ohio. They have all be women between the ages of 21-25. That's the only connection they have that we know of." JJ said. Reid picked up the case file and started to read it.

Spencer saw a picture of one of the victims and froze. His worst fears suddenly came true. He didn't notice he was crying until he saw a tear fall onto the page. He quickly stood up and headed to the bathroom at the back of the Jet, not noticing the questioning looks on his team members faces.

The team looked at the file he had been looking at trying to find what had made him become so upset. Morgan saw the file and his face visibly paled. The Jane Doe looked just like Roxanne. Morgan turned around and walked over to the bathroom and knocked on the door praying that Reid would open the door and talk to him or at least let him be a shoulder to cry on.

Spencer means the world to him; he would do anything to make the younger agent happy. Morgan waited for a few minutes before he heard the click of the door being unlocked. Morgan entered the bathroom and closed and locked the door behind him before turning around to face Spencer.


End file.
